Archaeoacoustics

To you                     who
An echo                   To where
does it die                when it finishes
chasing the ends      of decomposing notes
nodding off to what was once before in treble halves
trembling

Trapped in graphite traces
embedded in microlightning spikes that
sear sounds onto these
retinotopic lines these
emototopic maps
pulsing plastic into crescendos spiraling spiraling
into screams winded from butterfly wings

Crack open my radioactive body
and you will near asymptotes of whispers rippling into
cacophonous entropy crashing into the universe
you will circle on amethyst sound
reverberating still so faintly of your existence

Trace your fingers on my clay skin and I will sing back
all that I once was
all that you once were
To me

"Whenever I hear goodbyes, reminds me baby of you I break down and cry, next time I'll be true, yeah" -- XX

the dimming window ripples into focus

and I try to find

Only specters stare back now

Sh—

                                                Shh—

shhudder 

and I try to find

myself in reflections 

melting into

Too much

I can only

feel

and I try to skin

myself

to find—

I don't bleed

but decrescendo

into

and the music

the music

don't feel like

before

In it I find

the last to revive

is me

Comptine D'un Autre été: L'après-midi (Rhyme of Another Summer: The Afternoon)

In the moment
Maybe it meant something
But maybe in retrospect
That's where I'll find myself

your eyes
your smile
Hold my ghosts

Each ones dies
Underneath this skin

I walk in a fantasy you don't measure
There is no poetry
Within our final conversation

A ring
I remember so well
But also not at all
you

Formula

just add water
and
it will look
like
poetry

Rework: Kitchen

I

You look only to the clock now
the air holds us hostage
dragging limp words out from
our suffocating suffering mouths

Our heads are offered up to
chopping blocks and hang heavy
from above
dangling dead
our feet dance light in air

II

But
there
air
ripples occasionally outwards
from the rare touch that crosses plastic walls
around us
within us

And I realize who I touch is not
you
but your second skin
Who I remember now is not the
you
who is now
                    but
                            but

III

We slice grapefruits in half
like we cut up silence
between you and
I

I cut these tomatoes
like I cut my fingers
observing the rotten
inside

"Am I dreaming? Will I ever find you now? I walk in circles but I'll never figure out what I mean to you, do I belong?" -- Ellie Goulding

dancing in the wind
slow motion will catch me when I fall
in this world without color
melting melting
words carefully crafted
slide off pages
catching into air
and the wind will cut me into halves
one for me one for you
till I am no more
and will be forever
dancing in the wind

Done

I write on
dying pages
dimming screens
deadly silence

Reminders

Carve out my heart

Slice my arms

Rip off my head 

So I will cease to exist 

So you will cease to exist 

"Because they're my interests" 

No to erase to erase to erase

"Because I want to help others" 

No to fill to fill to fill

"Because I'm passionate about the cause" 

This entrenched hole you have left in me 

Anymore

You don't care do you when our hands touch 
briefly 
              crossing 

our circles
though barriers of thin plastic 
still stand 
              between 
us 
And I realize who I touch is not
you
but your second
                           skin
Who I remember is not
you now
               but
                      but 

We cut up thick silence as we cut 
             grapefruits 
The air
             hangs
             heavy
I cut these tomatoes like I cut 
             my fingers
observing the 
rotten 
inside

Yesterday Today Tomorrow

cool air comes to crawl through my window
and I ascend slowly from each
level of Dante's dreams
to meet it in
shivers

I stumble off my pedestal only to rise
into swells of clouding memories and
bitter aftertaste of shriveling tears
what is there to wear today but
silence?

murmur murmur the petals of my cinnamon muffin flake off
and the rain chases me down this warping street
falling into puddles I step on chaos in the form of violent
waves rippling out underneath me till I can only
feel

all too keenly the swaying of the bridge
holding me close to you to you to you
these pages turn too fast
and this story is ending all too soon
The End

"Still hating you, who has let me go. My frigid, cooled heart is still missing you" -- 2ne1

I lie here
wishful while waiting for
words I can't help but want
as I waste away wistful and wilting
missing you in wintering
windows between seconds
searing through the weeks
too fast to destruction

that in a blink
life has finished

and in each person I have met
I searched only for you

that in every moment I have lived
I spent feeling only your absence

"We write to taste life twice, in the moment and in retrospect" -- Anaïs Nin

in another life
perhaps
we could have been